Which reminds me of a story.
When I was growing up, there was a Scottish drunk called Jimmy Two Sticks, thus named because he could only walk with the aid of (yes you guessed it) two sticks. Anyway, he was quite abusive most of the time, and one day he shouted to me "Your mother was the best f**k I ever had", and quick as a flash I shouted back "yes, but she said you were the worst she ever had". He went nuts, and tried to chase me down the street, swinging his sticks and effing and blinding like a mad man. I was laughing so much I could hardly run, which didn't matter, luckily.
Sorry for that, but you reminded me of it, and it was nice to remember being young.